10 Quotes from The Office that I can relate to….

I love The Office. In an extremely unhealthy – if I could marry an actual show I would – kind of way. I can quote it almost word for word, I fall asleep to it, I never tire of it. Except for the last few seasons, they were utter shit, but ya know what? That said, I’ll still watch those seasons – that’s how much of an addict I am. So I have come to find that there are certain snippets or quotes that I particularly relate to. I don’t work in an office, but I have. My job is not nearly as mundane a mid level paper salesman. But there are just some sentiments that are universal. Here are 10 quotes from this fantabulous show that are nearest and dearest to my heart:

#1 – “And I knew exactly what to do. But in a much more real sense, I had no idea what to do.”

– Michael Scott

I swim in these waters ALL THE TIME! Fake it ’til you make it…..wing it….LEROY JENKKKINNSSS! Whatever you want to call it, it’s totally a legit method and works a good portion of the time!

#2 – “Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy. Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.

– Michael Scott

Who doesn’t want people to be afraid of how much they love you?

#3 – “I talk a lot, so I’ve learned to tune myself out.”

– Kelly Kapoor

Can I get an AMEN? Seriously, I say ALOT of stuff. I am not afraid to use words. I sprinkle that shit like glitter.

#4 – “I just want to lie on the beach and eat hot dogs. That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”

– Kevin Malone

Dream job. With the caveat that the calories don’t stick. And sidenote, Kevin is one of my least favorite characters. But, this is where we find some common ground.

#5 – “I have a dream, and it’s not some MLK dream of equality. I want to own a decommissioned lighthouse. And I want to live at the top. And nobody knows I live there. And there’s a button that I can press and launch that lighthouse into space.”

— Stanley Hudson

I can respect this wholeheartedly. I love a man (or woman) with a plan. And why not go all out? Hell, shoot yourself into friggin’ space if you want to. It’s worked for Elon Musk right?

#6 – “That’s what she said!”

— Michael Scott

I say this way too much. It is by far my favorite line. I use this at work. I use this at home. Both my 15 year old and my 10 year old use this more than they should. I don’t care – I will always say “that’s what she said”, whenever and wherever it applies, whether it’s appropriate or not.

#7 – “If I had to, I could clean out my desk in five seconds, and nobody would ever know that I’d ever been here. And I’d forget, too.”

— Ryan Howard

I don’t have an office, therefore, I do’nt have a desk. But I have always said my agency would replace me in a heartbeat and never skip a beat. I’d be dust in the wind, no matter how important I think I am!

#8 – “So this is my life — until I win the lottery. Or Pam finally writes that series of young adult books.”

— Jim Halpert

Who hasn’t had this fantasy? Not about Pam. At least I haven’t fantasized about Pam. Jim? Maybe. But I digress – I’m specifically referring to winning the lottery and writing books. I like both of those fantasies.

#9 – “I don’t care what they say about me. I just want to eat. Which I realize is a lot to ask for…at a dinner party.”

— Pam Beesley

This one touches my soul. You could literally tell me you hate me to my face and I’d be fine with it as long as you provide snacks or possibly a charcuterie board while you are saying it. Don’t withhold food from me…ever.

#10 – “Your body is a temple. You have to respect it. You can’t just whore it out.”

— Angela Martin

I dont often agree with Angela but she’s got a damn good point here.

There you have it. There are so many more but I can absolutely identify with the above listed 10. Even if you don’t like The Office (and if you don’t, you can kindly F off) you may recognize yourself in some of these little quips. I would gladly take a desk in the annex just to be a part of this amazing team. Even if it’s next to Toby.